A First-Timer's Pregnancy Must Haves
Something I realized very early on in my pregnancy is that there is no shortage of sources who are more than happy to tell first-time parents what to eat, wear, buy, think, and everything in between. In fact, the only thing more abundant than (often unsolicited) advice on what to do while pregnant is advice about what not to do. Books, magazines, documentaries, blogs, online forums, people in your DMs, strangers on the street, your second cousin’s friend who found your Instagram somehow and has strong opinions about you drinking that coffee… everybody’s got something to say!
It’s a goal of mine to never, ever become that person.
One of my earliest decisions as an expectant parent was to adopt the attitude: “Good for you, not for me!” It’s a mindset that has yet to fail me in other areas of life, and allows unsolicited opinions and advice to flow past me like waves.
As a pregnancy first-timer, I naturally have a ton of questions about the coming months, childbirth, bringing home baby, and the not-exactly-minor topic of raising an infant human. When these arise, I consult people I know and trust, but if any of their input doesn’t feel right for my family or personal needs, I’ve got no problem adding to the running mental list of “GFYNFM” items.
You recommend jogging a couple of miles per day throughout the pregnancy? Good for you, not for me.
You loved hosting a gender reveal party? Good for you, not for me!
You went for a totally natural birth and swore off epidurals? Good for you, definitely not for me.
Everyone’s got their own journey, and I truly believe that there’s no one-size-fits-all pregnancy. I love how varied the childbearing and parenting experience can be for different people! I never want to assume that how I’m doing something is the right way for anyone but me and my little bean of a human. I’ll happily share my experience when asked, but I try my best to hold off on doing so without prompting. Different strokes for different folks; what’s good for me may not be good for you.
That being said… you’re on my blog reading a post about pregnancy must-haves. I’m going to assume that means you want to hear about what I’ve enjoyed for the first six months of this experience! So, without further ado, here are the products and resources that’ve kept me going so far. (See something not quite your speed? Feel free to add any of these first-time pregnancy must-haves to your own “GFYNFM” list. Trust me, it’s liberating.)
Quick note: I’d only ever recommend products on my blog that I’ve independently purchased myself, use, and love! This post may contain affiliate links to products that fit that description. TL;DR — theoretically, if you decided to buy something using one of those links, I’d get paid a small amount. Rest assured that, in such an event, I’d put any money earned toward a prenatal massage and not toward a college fund, because I’m selfish. Mama’s back hurts and this kid is already getting enough out of me as I literally grow them from scratch.
Beauty
Hatch Mama The Belly Oil ($58) — I’ll admit that I fell victim to Instagram targeting with this first product, but I’ve really loved the ritual of rubbing this grapefruit, almond, and calendula oil into my growing belly after each shower. I may still sprout stretch marks before this pregnancy is through, considering that they’re totally natural and I’ve gotten them since puberty, but this oil helps moisturize my taut, itchiness-prone skin without leaving a greasy feeling behind. Plus, one bottle is going to last me the entire pregnancy: I’m only halfway through mine and I’m in week 24!
EverEden Soothing Belly Mask ($11) — People don’t really talk about how itchy your stomach gets when it’s growing like crazy, so let me be the one to shout it from the rooftops. YOUR TUMMY GETS ITCHY! This belly sheet mask struck me as dumb when I first saw it, but it turns out that it’s a nice treat when I just want to relax after an extra itchy day.
Burt’s Bees Coconut Foot Cream ($8) — I’m one of the lucky ones whose feet and ankles started to hurt very early on in pregnancy, which means I’ve been guilt-tripping Christopher into foot rubs at any possible opportunity. If he’s sitting down, my toes are wiggling in his face. This affordable foot cream has been great for those foot rubs, and I love the smell of coconut no matter the season!
Cocofloss Coconut Dental Floss ($25 for a six-month supply) — Another fun pregnancy fact: because you’ve got more blood than usual during pregnancy, you’re super prone to gingivitis and your gums will bleed like there’s been a murder! Staying on top of dental hygiene is extra key for pregnant folks, and I hate flossing a lot less when I’m using this coconut dental floss. Cocofloss has been my staple since long before pregnancy, and it’s quickly become an un-skippable part of my nighttime routine!
Kinship Self Reflect Probiotic Moisturizing Sunscreen ($25) — Pregnant or not, I’m obsessive about SPF. I wear it every day! This one has been my go-to since Kinship launched in 2019 because of its plant-based formula, planet-friendly packaging, and the fact that it melts into my skin like butter without leaving any feeling of greasiness or lasting residue. Now that I know I’m more prone to melasma, I’m even more neurotic about applying this sunscreen first thing in the AM.
Smith’s Rosebud Salve ($7) — I’ve used this balm since I was a teenager and it’s never failed me. Now that I’m visiting the doctor more often and wearing my masks for longer periods, I’ve started reaching for this instead of lipstick because it keeps my lips hydrated, smelling lovely, and not too sticky!
Sol de Janiero Brazilian Bum Bum Cream ($20) — After I use the Hatch oil on my tummy, I reach for this delightfully fragrant cream for my butt, hips, and lower back. Is it something I like particularly because I’m pregnant? No. Do I use it daily anyway? Yep.
Kosas Revealer Super Creamy + Brightening Concealer ($28) — Most days I’ve been pregnant, my makeup routine has only consisted of SPF, lip balm, and this concealer. I’ve had a tough time sleeping through the night since the very start of this pregnancy, and this creamy formula helps disguise the shadows beneath my eyes to help me look a bit more awake. I’m sure it will become even more essential once I’ve got a newborn!
Health
Nature’s Bounty Fish Oil ($9) — There’s nothing supremely exciting about this fish oil, but my doc recommended I take it during pregnancy and so far it hasn’t been awful or fishy! To me, that’s a win.
One A Day Prenatal 1 Multivitamin ($34) — There are about ten million prenatal vitamins out there: fancy custom ones, made-for-Instagramming ones, gummy ones, liquid ones, super crunchy ones, and everything in between. I went for these because they have all the things I wanted in a prenatal vitamin (including folic acid for baby’s brain development) at a good price, I could find them at virtually any store, and my OB said: “Great choice!” They don’t give me heartburn or leave a yucky aftertaste and baby has been growing just fine, so I count that as a success.
Mommy’s Bliss Prenatal Regularity Support ($12) — There’s no such thing as TMI when you came to my blog to read about my pregnancy, so we’re going there: my worst symptom is that I was constipated as all hell during the first trimester. I’m talking “doctors thought I might be having complications due to the severity, sleeping maybe two hours a night if lucky, scared to eat anything but prunes” levels of constipated. It was a special cocktail of these orange and strawberry flavored regularity gummies twice daily, Colace every night, and psyllium husk powder in smoothies that eventually helped me through it. I officially know every trick in the book.
Nature’s Trove L-Theanine ($9) — Pregnancy means that I can’t take my prescription medication for anxiety, which is great because what could possibly be panic-inducing about bringing a new human into this world of rising sea levels, rapid climate change, and glaring structural inequity during a global pandemic? Anyway, I take L-Theanine now as a natural substitute at my doctor’s recommendation. It’s no benzo, but it does the job.
Style
Storq Maternity Anytime Overalls ($105) — It’s no secret to the people in my life that I love a good onesie. Pre-pregnancy and before the pandemic, I’d embraced the boiler suit trend so much that I could make it through a whole fortnight without ever having to wear a separate shirt and pants. So when I stumbled across Storq’s Anytime Overalls and saw that they also work for postpartum, it was a no-brainer purchase! These overalls don’t disappoint: they’re made with a soft, stretchy fabric that is incredibly cozy and forgiving, have excellent pockets, and can be dressed up or down depending on your mood. I personally like to pair mine with a striped tee and Birkenstock sandals (see below), but I’m not against going Beverly Hillbillies with it come midsummer and just rocking a sports bra underneath. It’s not like I leave the house much anyway.
Birkenstocks Madrid Birko-Flor ($80) — Shortly before giving birth to her third child, Eva Chen posted on Instagram that wearing supportive sandals like these Birks can help prevent your feet permanently changing size during pregnancy. I have zero clue if it’s true, but when my feet started swelling and aching before I’d even reached the halfway point of this pregnancy I knew I needed a pair of sandals with great arch support that I could easily slip on and off. These Madrid style sandals in metallic gold and the more affordable and lightweight Madrid Essentials in metallic silver ($30) are basically the only shoes I wear anymore!
Kindred Bravely 3-For-$30 Underwear Bundle ($30 for three pairs…. *Snape voice* obviously) — At a certain stage, your stomach starts to outgrow even your most loose-fit granny panties and you have to invest in underwear with bands that won’t cut into your tummy. I ordered this three pack of Kindred Bravely underwear and when it arrived, I turned back around and ordered two more packs. (So I hate doing the laundry; sue me!) I love how these underwear fit low to accommodate a growing bump and come in a soft, stretchy material that’s perfect beneath leggings, bike shorts, dresses, or virtually anything else you might be included to wear. Kindred Bravely also has some great maternity bras and even swimsuits, but I’ll limit discussion of my undergarments to only one endorsement. For now.
Isabel Maternity by Ingrid & Isabel Tank Tops ($10 each) — I have this tank in maybe six different colors, and it might be the most comfortable item of clothing I own! If you follow me on Instagram, get used to only seeing me in several variations of the same shirt for the foreseeable future. I live in these.
Allbirds Wool Runners ($95) — I bought my Allbirds runners back in 2017(!!!) before my trip to Korea, and I still reach for them more than any other sneaker in my closet. They’re great for walking. Sometimes I won’t even wear socks with them because the wool is so cozy. If I’m not wearing my Birks these days, I’m sporting my Allbirds.
Old Navy Full Panel Jersey Biker Shorts ($18) — I won’t lie to you: these bike shorts aren’t the greatest quality. They’re made with a thin, almost tee-shirt-like material, so they are cozy but work best underneath a baggy shirt because some colors skew sheer! However, I couldn’t beat the price and wear mine around the house constantly now that the weather is warm. My dogs don’t care if they can see my underwear through my shorts, and I like the breathable fabric during the warmer months spent working from home. If you’re looking for a higher quality maternity bike short, Storq’s option ($58) or Blanqi shorts ($38) are both solid picks.
Aerie Printed Ruffle Bikini Top ($25) + Cheekier Bikini Bottom ($12) — I didn’t spend two decades combatting self consciousness about my body and finally learning to love bikinis at 27 only to get pregnant and stop wearing them. After all, minus my new outie, this is probably the least preoccupied with how my stomach looks that I’ve ever been or ever will be again. So, I ordered a string bikini to accommodate my bump for the summer! I like that both the top and bottoms are fully adjustable and still give a decent amount of coverage to the important bits.
MiYang Off-Shoulder Maternity Swimsuit, Lemon Printed ($35) — I fully intend to spend most weekends this summer out in my backyard in the shade of our lemon tree, relaxing in my blow-up kiddie pool. (See below for pool details!) This maternity one-piece matches the pool, the tree, and my ideal summer vibes with its bright colored print and ruffles, and it’s a perfectly good suit for the price.
Maacie Soft Ruffled Front Maternity Swimsuit, Purple ($24) — My favorite pre-preggo swimsuit is a deep-V one piece in this same color from Aerie, so I’m doing my best to replicate it while accommodating my new body. This suit is extremely affordable so I won’t feel bad donating or re-homing it with another pregnant person after the summer ends, and it does the job! Nothing groundbreaking but also nothing bank-breaking, which is key with maternity gear that I only really need for six months.
Miscellaneous
Leachco Snoogle Pregnancy Total Body Pillow ($50 - $65) — I made the mistake of reading What to Expect When You’re Expecting early on in pregnancy and letting it scare the absolute crap out of me. One of the biggest things that spooked me was the idea that pregnant women should never sleep on their backs, because supposedly the weight of the fetus could suppress an artery in the spine and lead to developmental damage. As a lifelong back sleeper, I spent my already sleepless nights early on in pregnancy tossing and turning, unable to get comfortable and bolting upright flooded with guilt if I did finally doze off and roll onto my back. I bought the Snoogle because it’s the only pillow that actually helped me get comfortable with side sleeping… shortly before I complained about not being able to sleep on my back to my OB, who promptly rolled her eyes and said: “Did you read What to Expect? Excuse my language, but that book is full of fear-mongering bullshit.” Oh well, at least the Snoogle is comfy!
Monday Zero Alcohol Gin ($40) — It’s no secret that I love me a good drink, and it’s been a rough adjustment losing the ritual of crafting a cocktail. Thankfully, this alcohol-free gin has been a great alternative! It smells spot-on like the real thing, and works beautifully for a faux gin fizz or a zero proof bee’s knees. I also really enjoy a virgin margarita with Ritual Zero Proof Tequila Alternative!
Boppy Maternity Wedge Pillow ($16) — I’ve somehow managed to become a person who sleeps with four pillows: under under my head, one over my head to muffle sound, the Snoogle, and now this Boppy stomach wedge, which helps my growing bump feel supported if I sleep on my side. It also works between my legs if I want, or helps to prop up my head and neck when my allergies are acting up and I can’t sleep well when fully laying down.
Squatty Potty, Slim Teak Finish ($53) — Remember when I said I know all the tricks in the bathroom book? One of those is the squatty potty. But if you don’t want some ugly white plastic monstrosity in your bathroom, I definitely suggest investing in the sleeker, subtler teak version. We have one in each restroom of our house! Game changer.
Minnidip Tufted Kiddie Pool ($53) — It’s only late June and I can already tell you that experiencing the third trimester in a California drought summer is going to be a doozy. So when I got a discount code for Target in my birthday month, I sprung for a chic-looking kiddie pool that I can sit in during the hot months. It’s quick and easy to both fill up and deflate, and it fits perfectly in the shady spot beneath our lemon tree!
Water Bottle With Hourly Indicator ($16) — It’s more important than ever for me to stay hydrated, and while I still do a bad job at remembering to sip my water, it’s helpful to have a judgmental bottle that guilts me into drinking frequently. The strap on the neck is easy to hang onto even when I’m out walking or at the farmers’ market, and it’s slim enough to fit in my car’s cupholders.
The Peanut app (free) — I have an amazing community of friends, but I also know that I’ll want to have some local fellow parents who have kids due around the same time so that we can do park meetups and things that, you know… parents do, I guess? So I signed up for Peanut, which is like Tinder for expectant parents, and it’s been easy to connect with like-minded pregnant women with similar interests. All I have to do is get better at replying to messages! Hopefully it’ll help me find a community of moms to hang with as we navigate new parenthood, even during a weird moment where there haven’t been birthing classes or prenatal yoga sessions for the chance at a friend meet-cute.
Reading
Expecting Better by Emily Oster — Remember how my OB talked smack about What to Expect When You’re Expecting? Well, as the title might suggest, Expecting Better is basically the counter to all the fear-mongering lists of things you can’t do. Written by an economist who digs into the data around pregnancy studies, this book made me feel a lot better about (gasp!) having that cup of coffee or springing for a piece of fresh yellowtail nigiri at a nice sushi restaurant. I’m still pretty risk-averse by nature, but feeling better equipped to understand the science behind the recommendations for a healthy pregnancy was empowering.
The Baby Owner’s Manual by Louis and Joe Borgenicht — I bought this book as a joke because of the style in which it’s written, but it turns out that it’s jam-packed with solid advice! A lot of the tactics for holding, feeding, and caring for babies is spot on and got the seal of approval from several trusted recent parents in my life. Score!
Brave New Mama by Vicki Rivard — With all the books, forums, articles, and everything else out there ready to hurl unwarranted opinions at new moms, this book of poems is a breath of fresh air. One of my dear friends sent it to me shortly after we shared our pregnancy news and it made me cry as soon as I flipped it open. I’ve spent a good amount of time sitting in the glider in our nursery reading different poems, and they’re beautifully simple and non-judgy. I plan to pay it forward and send it to other expectant moms in my life in hopes that it lifts their spirits and gets them excited about the parenting journey like it did for me!
